Why is Kalev Sepp so unbelievably HOT? Is it because he conducted counterinsurgency operations in Latin America in the 1980s? Is it because he’s a Special Forces guy with a PhD from Harvard? NO – it’s because he has facial hair! And ladies, do you know what well-groomed facial hair signifies? Facial hair means that a man is in touch with his ANIMAL nature – grrrrrr! Now some of the babes in the building (e.g., the Pentagon) say that Kalev – or Gunner as he is known to his fans – really needs to update his whole look. I mean, those huge rimless glasses are just screaming “Wonk! Wonk! Wonk!” And, what’s with the ties from 1975? Let’s just admit that the whole image thing is a BIG problem for guys who’ve spent their whole life in a uniform. You get out of bed; you put on your BDUs. The only choice you get is light, medium, or heavy starch. And of course, there are those slaves to the masculine ego who actually have their BDUs tailored. Can you IMAGINE? The vanity! Then, when you leave the military you are faced with too much CHOICE! I mean, you don’t have to wear just woodland or desert camouflage anymore, now you can wear plaid, houndstooth, pinstripes or – heaven forbid – gray flannel! This explains why DC is such a fashion sinkhole: confronted with too much choice, former military guys resort to the standard defense contractor uniform: gray slacks, blue shirt, blue blazer, red tie. What ever happened to knee breeches, riding boots and a CAPE? Now, Gunner (whatever anyone says) has managed to spurn the DC standard uniform and send a powerful symbolic message to females worldwide: GRRRRR!
